I wish my joy wasn’t determined by my circumstances. I wish that I could always control my emotions, and not let them gain control of me. And I wish that I was always able to filter out the bad thoughts in my mind, spotting the lies and getting rid of them before they had time to take root in me.
Well, I’m human, I suppose. Aren’t we all? There are always things that will get us down, and circumstances that will always be out of our control no matter how much we try to control them.
It’s funny how often I think I’ve got everything down, only to have one little thing set me off. Then I realize just how much I need Jesus in my life. He’s the one in control, and the only one that can transform me by the renewing of my mind. His will is good, pleasing, and perfect, and he will let me know what his will is, just as soon as I get on the same page as him.
I’ve not been on the same page as Jesus lately. I do not like the nausea, fatigue, and swirling emotions of being pregnant. It makes me not really enjoy the things I usually love doing–anything from running, playing with my kids, or even reading my Bible and praying. That just feels like another thing I have to do that I don’t really want to do. It’s fine for a while until I realize that my mind is not being renewed daily. How I daily, hourly, and even by the minute need the love, peace, joy, and strength of the Lord! I don’t miss it necessarily until I realize it’s been a few weeks since I’ve really spent time with Jesus to let him renew me.
Letting Jesus renew my mind is how I can actually find joy in tough circumstances, how I can stay grounded in the middle of crazy emotions, and how I can keep lovely, noble, pure, and true thoughts in my head. Even if I mess up, knowing that Jesus wants to give me strength and help me do better is how I can keep from beating myself up all the time.
So renew your mind. Find some time to think and reflect on the perfect truths God has given us in the Bible, pray for what you need when you need it (no matter how often that is!), and take a little bit of time to be STILL. Being still looks different for everyone. For me, being still doesn’t really mean being still at all, but means emptying my mind. I love going on a long run or walk or hike with no music to help me focus on the things that really matter. I love doing artwork, or just being outside. Sometimes playing with my kids and hearing their innocent laughter can make me remember what really matters, even if it’s the kids that are driving me bonkers!
I’m not always perfect at this, and I’m sure you won’t be either. But just trying is pleasing and honoring to God. He of course is waiting for you, yearning to transform and renew you into a beautiful creation full of life, love, and laughter!